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Saturday, February 4, 2012

Blood Will Always Be Thicker Than Water

My family is ridiculously big. Both of my parents remarried after their divorce in 2000, and my family has grown greatly. I now have 3 sisters and a brother (2, if you count my four-legged one.) I have many cousins, aunts, uncles, grandmas, grandpas. It's a crazy life. It will always boil down to the original sisters though.

I have 2 blood sisters. My older sister is 22, and my younger sister is 14. I've always had issues with my sisters, like any girl has. It almost seemed abnormally abusive with my sisters. It was not always something where we would fight and get over it within an hour. It was to the point where my older sister and I hardly spoke. We were always pissed off at each other. It was one of the hardest things of my life to cope with. My younger sister was becoming more outgoing and it got to the point where I would say "fuck you" to her if she even bothered to come within the vicinity of my person. I was so tired of the abuse from my sisters and my mother that I decided to move in with my father. My older sister looked down on me because she sacrificed so much for my younger sister and I when I was in grade school. She basically said it wasn't fair that she had to suffer and I'm getting off easy. I was torn up from the horrible things my sister would say about my father and myself. We went for months without talking. It took a text message for us to finally talk.

When we made up, it put me at a peace that wouldn't last. I changed high schools my junior year of high school, and my family was not supportive about it at all. My sister and brother had graduated from the same high school, and my little sisters are going to graduate from there too. I'm the only one to graduate from another school. My mother took this very hard as well. She cried before my graduation telling me that I needed to be at my old school. That was my true place, yet I felt insecure there. She does not know of the horrors that I faced in those hallways. My sisters will never know of the horrors that I dream of.

When I accepted my admission to the university I'm at, my family didn't seem to let it set in their mind that I would be out of state. I would be far away from them, and I would be living my life without them. It was a foreign concept. When my final 2 weeks in Michigan came, it seemed to be real. I was packing up my boxes for school. I was having going away/birthday parties since I wouldn't be in Michigan for my birthday. My sisters seemed to realize how much we needed each other in the last month I was in Michigan. My older sister came to support me, bringing me things for school, and writing a letter telling me to call/text/facebook her. It was the first time in a long time that I felt a connection with my sister. She really did understand what I was going through. Even if she was only 20 minutes away from home, she still had a similar experience as a freshman in college. It created a tie that my parents were amazed at. My younger sister didn't show that she would miss me so much. I don't think it settled in until she was on the way back to Michigan without me.

The first month of school was crazy, but it showed how much love my sisters and I have for each other now that we are older. We have truly matured. My sister and I texted almost every day. It was a daily thing for me to call her during our break for chapel. It was common for my sister and I to send pictures and update each other on everything going on. It was the best feeling knowing I had my older sister to understand my life. My little sister and I don't talk a lot, but I love that my sister is making an effort to talk to me more. I was most upset about leaving her during her freshman year of high school. She doesn't have the same guidance I had when I was a freshman in high school. Now that she has a handle on things, she texts, calls and skypes me. It amazes me that it took my moving away for us to become the unit we are now. I've never felt more love from my sisters. I've never felt more love from my mother, stepfather, father, stepmother, and every relative in between. At the end of the day, blood is thicker than water. No matter who I meet and jokingly call "grandma", "mom", "dad" etc., I will always know who brought me into this world and raised me.

Getting ready for a skype date with the sister,
Sierra

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