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Saturday, January 28, 2012

What Really Matters In Life...

Dealing with the stress of being an adult, I can understand that there are going to be things that I desire or complain about. Ever since I started my classes at the university I'm currently attending, I've went through a lot of stress and whining. I'll be honest, I whined a lot to my parents. I hated that I was broke (still am, actually.) I didn't like working 17 hours a week for my jobs, on top of the 17 credit hours I was taking for my major. It was a lot to cope with. On top of the reality of entering the work force and college, I was adjusting to being almost 4 hours away from any family.

I'll admit, I'm used to being pampered with parents who are home for dinner and have family night. I'm used to falling asleep with a dog in my bed, and knowing I'll wake up to a parent home, or to breakfast. I lived a pampered life. Now that I'm in college, I wake up to a dorm room that resembles prison walls. I wake up to a girl that was a complete stranger to me, and still is. I wake up to a messy room with dishes, homework, books scattered around, laundry, and a list of things that I wish were different. There have been times where I've let my depression get the best of me, and I was lazy all day. I wouldn't get up and see friends. I would stay in my dorm, attempt to clean, and ignore the world. It was something that I knew wasn't right, yet I continued it because I felt I deserved it. I felt that was more important.

Now that I've been through a full semester of college, I can say that I've learned what really matters in life. While I do despise that I'm broke, I understand that the money isn't what is important. It is the benefit of learning new skills and meeting new people. It is the benefit of learning to communicate in the work place. Instead of dreading my homework, I understand it is the opportunity to educate myself on the things I want to be around in the future. Instead of looking at the dreary side of being on my own, I consider it a chance to show my parents how much they have influenced me over the years. I'll admit that I regress in age when I come home, but I try to stay on my best behavior. I have not always been the perfect child, and I want to show them that they can trust me to be on my own without making bad choices.

On top of the little things in life, I understand the bigger picture. Being in college, I understand that the people I interact with now are going to be the network of people that I continue to see and connect with for the rest of my life. The things that I considered to be problems in high school, I can look back and use that to strengthen myself. As for the laundry list of whining and complaining, I understand that these things are not burdens. They are a gift. Why do I see these as gifts? They are evidence that I'm alive and I have a purpose. It's not that God is toying with my emotions and seeing how much I can take. God is trying to help me understand that I was blessed with my life. Not everyone will have the opportunities that I have now.

Moral of today: Don't look at the fine details and wish for something better. What you consider to be "shit", "crappy", "bull" etc., others would kill for. When we complain that our lives are terrible, there is someone out there who has it much worse than we do. Thank God for every day that we have, and all the opporunities we face, no matter how tiring, annoying, and miniscule they may be.

Glass half full, not half empty,
Sierra

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